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There’s this guy I dated briefly–before Frenchy and after the boyfriend whose name I cannot bear to utter. I first met him in a summer studio when I was 19 years old. I hated him.

2 summers later and his sense of humor and unpredictable personality, combined w/his unsatiable wanderlust made me think of him differently. I loved that he was this very plain frat boy on the outside, yet all he did was talk about books and philosophy and traveling in the most unpretentious of ways. He wanted to take me on random road trips in the middle of the week. On a Monday night, we would go to a bar and dance the night away. And then there were times when we could spend hours in an art museum–2 people from complete opposite ends of the spectrum–and have so much to say.

True to form, however, he was also the most ridiculously stupid boy I have ever in my life dated. It was almost as if the idea of me or a relationship with me, paralyzed him. One day, I received a call from him. He had moved to Mexico. End of story.

I bring this up bc out of the blue, he emailed me. Twice. Pretty long emails, too. Theyre just catchup emails, and I dont think they are intended to mean anything, but it somewhat supports my theory that once a guy gets the career thing in place, then they start to finally want and realize the relationship thing. It just so happens he finished grad school (an MFA of all things) and talked about visiting SF.

Its crazy to think that someone Ive known since I was a teenager–a guy who I never really considered my boyfriend–is, after all this time, still making an effort to keep in touch; to remain in contact. To be in my life. For whatever reason, we still orbit w/in the same plane, and for whatever reason, I find that comforting.

Like all the boys in my life, there are moments when our paths are closer, and moments when they are further apart, but despite the years and distance, they are still there.

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Went out w/Drei2 today for dinner(an amazing dinner btw)Β Its been so long and we both really connected over stories of failed relationships and subsequent heartbreak. On the way home, he played all these angry songs for me about how love sucks. And then, he followed with a song about how nothing is ever lost.

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