No problem about the phone thing, although I appreciate your
reassurance that it is not a specific aversion to conversing with me. I’ll be
happy to communicate with you via email, carrier pigeon, singing telegram, and
airplane messages written in the sky in smoke.
Since you so graciously offerred, I daresay I would greatly enjoy receiving all correspondence via hand caligraphed (quill dipped in ink, of course) letters on hand-pressed watermarked paper (or a scroll depending on length of notation), folded and sealed with wax. The letter itself should be folded in such a way that would render an envelope unnecessary. Additionally, I expect said letters to be written by candlelight on an antique wooden desk, using english spellings such as “colour” and “theatre.”
You can place the aforementioned letters in a secret hiding place–perhaps a small crevice in a brick wall in an abandoned garden–or you can have your steward hand deliver them (as I assume there will be multiple letters) to my local address.
I expect to receive all correspondence in a timely fashion and without hesitation or delay.
C and I always joke that if you took his emails, transcribed them onto parchment and sealed it with a wax seal, then it would seem as if the letter were written in victorian times. he doesnt know we…er..I…think that…well, maybe he does now.